Counting Down....

When we are young
Wandering the face of the Earth
Wondering what our dreams might be worth
Learning that we're only immortal
For a limited time
Rush - Dreamline

I'm in a reflective mood; it is really starting to dawn on me that my time in India is quickly counting down to an end.

There are so many things I though I'd be able to do because "I have so much time". It turns out in the Paul vs. Time competition Time is going to win quite decisively. The list of things I wanted to do and just won't have time for keeps growing every day:
-Trek the Himalayas
-Visit Chennai, Pondicherry, Mumbai, Kolkata
-Tour Tamil Nadu by train
-Go to Bangkok and Hong Kong
-Visit Varanasi
-Etc.........
Don't get me wrong, I'm not cribbing about the opportunities I've had. I have seen more incredible, amazing, and beautiful, people, places and things than I ever could have expected. That's the problem though, the more I see the more I want to see and experience. When I'm asked "How was India", the only answer I can give that comes close to encompasing what this experience has meant to me is "Life Changing". Wanting to see more and more of the world, not to play it safe, and to put myself in uncomfortable situations, not only to learn about the differences and similarities in all cultures but also to keep learning about myself; is just one outcome.

The thing I am going to miss the most without question however is my "ex-pat family". I am truly astonished by how close we are, particularly my fellow Zen Gardens residents given that before coming here I've had very few close friends; many aquaintenances but few close friends.

We all have our own quirks, be it ensuring everyone sees the beautiful painting we bought in Vietnam, needing a completely empty room for yoga, or claiming not to like children yet volunteering to teach English at a children's charity, but we know and respect each others' uniqueness (often with sarcasm and jokes but respect nonetheless). For my part everyone may breathe a sigh of relief that they don't have to hear me say "Oh that reminds me...here is your useless trivia for the day" then proceed to tell them something truly gripping like the physics behind a converging-diverging rocket engine nozzle. I can't help it. Trivia for me is like an additional element at the base of Maslow's Hierarchy; Food, Shelter, Sex, Trivia.

I know we will get together when we are back in Minneapolis, and I am looking forward to seeing again the friends who have already returned but I know we'll never recapture the intimacy we shared here. The 4 hour brunches at Olive Beach where everyone individually decides to drink waaay too much, the get togethers were I can say 'before anything else I need to vent for 5 minutes' and everyone simply says 'OK, that's what we are here for', the e-mails saying 'who wants to go to XXX this weekend' and 4 people respond 'OK' and we all jump on a plane 6 days later and squeeze 4 people into 2 beds in one cheap hotel room somewhere in India, the impromptu hookah parties at my place, Thanksgiving dinner with horrible turkey and friends who drop the midwestern emotional stoicism to genuinely say what they are thankful for. And on and on and on...

I'll also miss all the new friends I've made here. Other ex-pats from around the world and the people at Target, particularly my team. They have all taught me something about India and myself. They've shown me the world isn't black & white and my way of viewing it is only one of about 4 billion and counting. Thank-you, danyavath, shokria.

So now I'm frantically try to wrap up here; ensuring my team and work is in a good spot, gathering the souveniers I've procrastinated on purchasing, trying to buy a house in Minneapolis, researching cars (I'll need one of those again, aargh), squeezing in a couple last weekend trips and planning a 2 week stop over in Australia on the way back to Mpls. And as I think about what I will take with me from India I've decided to make a list of "Minneapolis Resolutions":
-Stay close with the friends I've made, those in Minneapolis and around the world
-Take at least 1 international vacation each year (one of which has to be trekking the himalayas)
-Don't let myself go back to thinking the world is black & white
-Smoke and drink less but continue to enjoy life just as much

After all, although we may only be immortal for a limited time and time will win every contest; I'm not quite ready yet to give up my immortality and stop wandering the Earth.